Everybody Gets The Best Of You Except You

Let me talk to the one everybody counts on.

You are the strong one. The dependable one. The one people call when it falls apart, the one who always seems to have it handled. You pour into everybody around you on a constant basis. You make sure your people are good, your family is good, your circle is good. And you are so used to being the one who holds it that you have almost forgotten you were ever supposed to be held too.

And I know this one all the way down, because it has been a sore spot in my own life. I am the life coach. I am the one who has it together, the one who helps everybody else find their footing. So when I hit my own rock bottom, I did not even know how to handle it. And when I looked at why, the answer stopped me cold.

I thought I was taking care of myself. I really did. I get my nails and my feet done. I get massages. I travel. I take my me time on the calendar and I show up for it. From the outside it looked like a woman who pours into herself. But here is what I finally had to admit. Getting my nails done was not the same as giving myself me. I had stopped actually pouring into myself the way I used to. My candles. My meditating. The quiet rituals that were never about looking good and always about coming home to myself. Those had fallen off. And I did not even notice, because I was too busy making sure everybody else had what they needed.

There is a difference between treating yourself and filling yourself. You can do all the nice things and still be running on empty, because a massage soothes the body but it does not refill the part of you that you keep pouring out. You can look completely put together and be scraping the bottom. I was.

And it took my people to say it to my face. You are too hard on yourself. You are too hard on yourself. They said it more than once, and I brushed it off every time, because I was still trying to make sure everybody else was good. Somewhere along the way I had picked up a quiet lie and started living by it, that I did not really deserve my me time, not the real kind, because I had to stay focused on everybody else. Like my own cup was optional. Like I could give and give and give and never once sit down and be poured back into.

That is a lie, and it is one of the most respectable lies there is, because the world claps for you while you do it. Everybody loves the person who never needs anything. They just do not tell you that person is quietly running themselves into the ground.

Here is where the CHOICES Lifestyle grabs you. It is the daily practice of choosing yourself on purpose, and that word yourself is not a throwaway. Choosing yourself means you get put on the list too, not last, not if there is time left over, but on it. Every day you get the same choice. Pour out everything you have and call it love, or pour into yourself first so there is something real to give. Choosing yourself is not selfish. It is the only way the giving lasts. You cannot keep drawing from a well you never refill.

And here is the WOW FACTOR Mindset, because this is what you forget when you are running on empty. You keep acting like you have to earn your rest by taking care of everybody else first. Like your worth is in how much you carry. But you were the prize before you ever picked up a single thing for anybody. You do not become worthy by pouring yourself out. You already are, standing still, doing nothing, holding no one. The magnetic thing in you does not come from how much you give. It comes from you being whole enough to give from overflow instead of from your last drop.

So let me ask you the question your people have been trying to get you to hear. When was the last time somebody got the best of you and it was you? Not the leftovers. Not what was scraped off the bottom after everybody else got theirs. The best. When did you last give that to yourself?

Stop being too hard on yourself. Put your own name back on the list. Light the candle. Sit in the quiet. Give yourself the same thing you hand everybody else without thinking twice. You are not the exception to the care you preach. You are the first one who needs it.

Until Next Time,

LaTonya MeChelle

If you are worn down from being everyone's strong one and you are ready to pour back into you, that is what your Clarity Session is for. One hour, just us, and for once you are the one being poured into. Ninety-seven dollars, and it credits toward whatever comes next when you keep going within seven days. Come as you actually are.

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