I sometimes look at relationships, and I wonder how they last. Who am I to talk? I was married for 12 years, and it didn’t work. Truthfully, that should be an even better reason for you to listen to me. People think just because a person is not in a situation, they have no right to give advice, NOT!!! Remember, I said I WAS in one...learn from my lessons.
I get it that men are supposed to be the providers. I get that they are supposed to take care of our needs, and if we are blessed, we will even get spoiled. I GET IT!!! If you ask me, it really should be a requirement. Not a privilege, not an entitlement, not a benefit but a requirement. However, why has society made it so that men are the only ones who are supposed to do for women?
Look at Valentine’s Day!!! We got this stuff all screwed up. How come it’s called a DAY of LOVE, yet it still appears as if women are the only ones benefiting? Doesn’t it take two to LOVE? Isn’t LOVE an AS ONE (two becomes one) thing? Isn’t LOVE a give-and-take? Some of yall are so busy taking and bragging that you don’t even realize that you’re setting yourself up for failure. Why do you feel that you deserve all the love and attention, yet you still aren’t giving it to your mate?
Men have gotten used to walking around like they don’t care or that they don’t need attention, but that’s a damn lie. They are worse than women, in my opinion. Why do you think a man breaks his neck to give you so much attention so that he can get the attention back? MEN LOVE ATTENTION!!! Why shouldn’t they? They’re humans too.
You will never find me making up excuses for a grown dang man, but I do believe that women can be a factor in why MEN cheat. In the past, I personally pushed my man to cheat. I went from showering his tail with everything, mainly my attention and affections, to nothing. I got scared and wasn’t ready for the level he wanted us to go. Instead of being a grown woman and expressing myself, I shut down and started withholding all the things he loved about me. He claims to this day that he didn’t cheat, but the woman he started hanging out with is now his wife, and they have a kid together. Imagine that!! I knew his weakness and that my rejecting him would push him away. No one deserves to feel rejected by someone who is supposed to love them.
You can’t tell me that MEN don’t crave attention just like women. Even the strongest, most powerful man wants attention. Not just attention but quality attention. They are similar to kids. Reward him with your version of a star (remember when you used to get stars for doing good as a child) and let him know that you appreciate him constantly. Simple things go a long way. I must advise you, don’t start something you can’t finish. Keep it up, and make it a point to put a smile on his face daily. Do you know why?
First and foremost, because if he is your man and you decide to be with him, HE DESERVES IT!!! He does it for you, why not do it for him? If he’s not doing it for you, do it anyways. Maybe if he sees you making an effort, he may start doing better. Secondly, if you won’t do it, please rest assured that someone else will do it and won’t have a problem taking care of your man. Never forget what made you want him in the first place!!! If you no longer want him or can’t take care of him, let him go.
Please never think that you’re the only woman who wants your man. There is someone out there who would die at the opportunity to take care of him and spoil him. You hold the key, Dear! Either use it or watch the locks get changed on you. Spoil that man, so when they are trying to shoot their shot, he will look at them, shake his head and say, Sweetie, you all that, but you are not my baby. I’m going home!!!
Are you giving your man the attention, he needs?